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Part 1
“You know what, if Tracy tells one more story about her failed marriage I’m gonna stab her in the throat with thi, wh-what the hell is this?”  I had been standing at Self Check-out for over six hours and still hadn’t gotten a break.  My feet were killing me and I was ready to go to war, where was Sun Tzu’s tactics when you needed them?  In my hand was the perfect weapon a knife of sorts or maybe something else.  It was left by a customer that I really like, I mean really.  She was just one of those types that taps a nerve so severely that you feel like strangling your own neck instead of hers.  But such a sweet lady she was.  I held it right side up, I think, in the side-eye view of the floor manager.  The bottom nearly poked my blue and red cashier shirt.  What would it matter anyway, this was my sixth shirt since I’ve started working at this grocery store.  With all the money “they” make they should be able to afford better quality.  My bottoms were khaki, provided by me of course.  Had to because there was no way I was gonna go through six pairs of pants.  The floor manager was walking in small steps but steadily.  She had been a bit spastic and spatial and I wasn’t sure why.  She stopped for a millisecond then continued on her way to the staircase that led to the managers’ offices.  “I’m not sure, but I believe it goes on aisle six, quickly put it back before it gets busy.”  Janet suddenly disappeared on the stairs leading up to Hell’s purgatory.  I started to walk away then changed my mind saying, “What for?  There are over a billion fucking go backs over here!”  Did I forget where I was?  A customer checking out directly in front of the podium I was standing at, was now right next to me right-hand side from the go backs.  I knew she heard me but was she gonna say something.  I quickly let it go and turned around from throwing that meaningless soldier weapon into one of the go back baskets.  And then.  It. Happened.  “Do you always speak with such foul language?”  I didn’t see her face but am pretty sure it looked like vomit in a cup.  Shut your fucking mouth you hag!  I actually said that in my head.  I turned to her eying her down.  She must have just gotten out of bed because her hair was done by a two year old.  Doesn’t she take pride in her looks?  That peach shirt stated she is a conservative and no man would ever love me was stamped across her face.  “Pardon my language I do respect my elders.”  An emphasis on elders.

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